Showing posts with label motherhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label motherhood. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 12, 2023

Schlaf, Kindlein, Schlaf

How do you wean a baby? And how do you know when is the right time to wean them? There are many experts and books about this, but as a mother, there is no specific time line. You just know when it comes. And it will come. 

Among my two daughters, the youngest is breastfed since birth. She is almost 3 now, but I still nurse her to sleep. I have been telling myself that it is about time she learns to sleep without nursing and every time I try, there is always drama and lots of crying and wailing until I have no choice but to give in just so I can give everyone the peace and quiet they need, and so that I too can go to sleep. 

But tonight I have a small victory. The little one managed to sleep without nursing. There was of course, some, errr, lots of, crying that came with it but she fell asleep without mama's precious milk. And I too can now go to sleep.... Or write this short post to remind me of the this small victory, this milestone. ☺️ 

Schlaf, Kindlein, schlaf... Mama is here, always and in all ways. Good night. 


Thursday, August 12, 2021

Almost One!


My baby Lilly is almost a year old now. Just one more week and she will be a year old. I sigh because time indeed flies so fast. And she will be going to the Kindergarten soon too, in September to be exact, because this mommy needs to go back to work in October.


A lot has happened since my last blog entry, when Lilly turned 10 months old. Since then, she can already make gestures or point at something if she wants to have it. But of course, she doesn't always get what she wants to get her hands on, especially if it will pose a danger to her. She also can understand simple instructions now, like "Please give Mama the ball" or "Can you give me a kiss?". When it comes to mobility, she can crawl now at lightning speed, and has learned to stand with her sole flat on the floor. She still sometimes tiptoes though, especially if she want to reach something that is on the coffee table. 


She loves going out now, and is more sociable. She doesn't willingly go to every people she meets but there is now a handful of our friends who can hold her in their arms without her screaming of fear or crying her heart out. Hopefully, this will help her as she adjusts to the day at the kindergarten.


We are still undecided though on whether we will celebrate her birthday with friends by throwing out a party or just go out to eat at one of a local restaurant here. It is always uncertain especially that the pandemic is not yet over. But we also don't want to just let her birthday go by, we want to do something special about it. I hope that we will be able to come up with something soon.

This mommy's heart wishes that she will remain to be a healthy baby and will always have a happy disposition. I wish that we will be able to provide her a good, happy and secure childhood, just like what her big sister had.  I hope and pray that everything will be better soon, so we can also travel back home, and she can get to know her grand parents, aunts and uncles, and cousins.


Tuesday, January 19, 2021

Lilly is Five Months Old

How time flies. Our Lilly is now five months old. Time does go by so fast especially in these unconventional times in the pandemic where our daily routine consists of nursing and waking up, changing diapers and playing games, singing lullabies and sharing cuddles, warm hugs and good night kisses. 


Lilly is doing good progress and despite being locked up most of the time at home, unable to visit friends and going on short excursions in zoos, I can say that she is developing well. She can now support her head and recognize our voices. When we lay her down on her stomach, she would make mini push-ups as she heaves her head up. She is also practicing to roll over, although she isn't able to do it alone yet. Slowly but surely, she will. Her favorite activity: munching on her fists and sticking toys to her mouth. She still hates pacifiers though but enjoys sucking her thumb. I remember her big sister is also the same. She can recognize faces now, and with only three faces to see, it is not very difficult to recognize who her favorite is. Me of course!

She is an adorable little darling who would scream out loud when she is hungry. But her giggles and coos are more than enough reward for those sometimes sleepless nights. She still wakes up once or twice into the night to nurse so this mommy is still not getting enough sleep but that is okay. Because I now know that they grow up so fast and so, I have to enjoy these moments as much as I can because it too shall soon pass.


Tuesday, November 17, 2020

2 Must-Do's Before Your Baby Arrives

If you're expecting a baby, you probably have a list a mile long of things you need to purchase, things that need to be done at work or at home, or even an endless stream of worries keeping you up at night. While all of that is normal, it can also take its toll. And because your overall health is so important during this exciting time, making sure you prioritize now will ensure a smoother transition upon baby's arrival. Read on for two must-do's to add to your list. 

1. Have a Plan for Childcare
Childcare is one of the most important things you'll need to figure out, and it can also be one of the most stressful. Since stress isn't good for either one of you, placing this at the top of your priority list will serve you well. That way when the time comes for you to go back to work, you'll already have a reliable plan in place. 

Since it might take a while to find a provider, setting up tours ahead of time for a daycare center Batavia OH will help you narrow down your options based on your personal preferences and provider availability. 

2. Purchase and Install the Car Seat
While getting the baby's car seat squared away early might not seem like something that should be done way in advance, rest assured it is. By planning ahead, you'll give yourself plenty of time to research different options, purchase it and have it professionally installed into your vehicle. 

Since your baby's safety is paramount, don't hesitate to devote a good amount of time to choosing a car seat. Having it professionally installed is also a great idea, particularly if you're a first-time parent. The peace of mind you'll receive will be more than worth it. 


Glückskind

I find the German word for happy child, Glückskind, very beautiful. The word "glück" has various meanings, depending on the context. It could mean happy, lucky, fortunate. It is both a noun and a verb and when formed with other words, changes its meaning, which oftentimes connotes something positive.

I would say that having children is a fortune. And being a mother of two doubles the happiness.


This word is also used by a leading drugstore here as its membeship promotion for expecting women and moms with children. DM, that's the drugstore's name, gives away a small box of happiness for mothers with newborns for free. All they have to do is register through the drugstore's official app and activate the coupon. I recently got my "Kofferchen" a few weeks ago and it is filled with lots of sample goodies from various baby products.



The box contained the following items: avent feeding bottle, nuk pacifier, Naty plastic- and chemical-free diaper, alana cotton baby cap, medela and lansinoh nursing pads, pampers aqua pure baby wipes, babylove diaper change cream, penaten ultra sensitive lotion, seba med baby wash and lotion, buebchen skin milk.


Even my baby is happy and surprised with the contents. So many products from trusted brands to try. So far, we have tried the babylove diaper change cream, DM's private brand, and I find it works better than the one I am using from a higher end brand. I have just tried the Naty diaper and we will see if it suits my baby's skin. Will update once I have used up both. We are currently using pampers premium protection diapers so let's see. Will we make the switch or not?

And no, this post is not paid. I am mentioning the brand names so other moms may also know of my experience with these products and may help them decide which product to use for their babies. 


Saturday, November 7, 2020

Lilly's 1st Month

On your first four weeks, a lot of things happened. It was a busy time as we prepared for our move to Ludwigsburg. You came three weeks early into this world you see, but I think that is a blessing in disguise, then we were already able to establish some kind of a routine. Had you been born on the day that you were supposed to come out, it would have been a lot more stressful for all of us.

Phototherapy to reduce bilirubin levels in newborns with jaundice.

With the pandemic, it is not simple. We always feel afraid for you and your big sister. But with the observance of proper hygiene, wearing of masks and only going out when necessary, you are both healthy and safe. Almost a week old and you had to be admitted back to the hospital because you had jaundice and you had to undergo phototherapy to lower the bilirubin levels in your blood. We both needed to be swabbed for Corona virus tests. This is a protocol for all patients admitted. They pierced you very tiny hands and feet with needles so they could check your blood properly. Hearing you screaming out in pain broke my heart I had to get out of the examination room because it was too heart wretching to witness. Also, it really pained me to see you inside the incubator with nothing but your diaper on and your "swimming" eye protector for a total of 12 hours, with 6 hours of break in between. You did not know how to breastfeed properly yet at that time and my milk supply is still too small so that feeding you was a challenge. I had to give you formula milk to supplement the breastmilk that I had to regularly pump. Thankfully, the therapy was a success and we were able to come home three days after. 

It could be muscle reflexes but this was one of first smiles
captured on camera at about 3 weeks old. 

As you turned a month old, we finally managed to go breastfeeding all the way. Such a huge feat for me since it has been my silent wish and desire to be able to nourish my child with my own milk. I was not able to do it with your Nee-chan and I thank the heavens I was able to do it with you. We still have our mishaps sometimes
👶🤦🏻‍♀️ especially when we try to find a comfortable breastfeeding position. It was a learning process for me, and all the sleepless nights made me feel very exhausted. I am thankful that your daddy is there to watch over you when he has the time and energy to allow me rest and get a few hours of sleep. 


Monday, October 26, 2020

What Happens When You Chose to Give Your Child Up for Adoption

Choosing to give up your child for adoption is never an easy decision to make. The aftermath of this decision will follow you throughout the rest of your life, so you should very carefully consider all your options before making the choice that's best for you and your child. 

Once you've made the decision to go through the adoption process, you should reach out to an adoption specialist or facilitator. They will likely be connected to the best adoption agencies for birth mothers and will be able to answers any questions about the process. 

The specialist or facilitator will help you choose the perfect adoptive family for your child. You will have complete control in choosing your child's future home. All the potential families are vetted by the adoption agency and have passed a home study and additional background texts. You can even chose to meet the family. 

In some cases, the decision to give the child up for adoption is not made until after the birth. This is quite common and adoption agencies have protocols in place should this occur. If the decision is made while in the hospital, the agency will still allow you to choose the family and can even let you communicate with them as they head to the hospital to receive their new family member. Agencies will also accept infants weeks or even months after they came home from the hospital.

It's understandable that the decision takes a while to make and you'll still have control over the family choice. No matter when you go through the adoption process, you will always have the option to meet the family and even chose to conduct an open adoption. This will allow you to have regular contact with your child after the adoption is completed. 

Once you decide to go through with an adoption, you can be rest assured that a large group of people will work alongside you tirelessly to ensure that your child is loved. 



Friday, October 23, 2020

Two Months Into Breastfeeding

My breastfeeding journey wasn't easy at first. But I am determined to breastfeed my baby however it takes... And just like that, my baby is already two months old. And I am happy to say that she is exclusively breastfeeding. Yay!!! The days seem to fly by in a flash. The sleepless nights I can still count, and they are worth it... every second, every minute of it. Thanks to the encouragement and advice of friends, I was able to pull it through. So what did I learn in those two months of breastfeeding?

That your breastmilk does not come automatically at first. So you will have to nurse your baby as often as you can to stimulate your breasts to produce more milk. Never skip a meal. It is important to eat properly so you will have your strength and eating a well-balanced food ensures that you get the nutrients your body needs to remain healthy. Drinking plenty of water and nursing tea keeps you hydrated and ensures that you don't dry out. It is also important to get enough rest. There is always the temptation of doing house chores or other things when your baby is asleep, but trust me, you need as much sleep so you have the strength to feed especially in the wee hours of the morning. For newborns, they feed like every two hours so you need to be awake too when you baby needs to nurse. Support of your family is also very important. When they can look after your baby for a couple of hours so you can have some time for yourself  or you can get some restful sleep, that is really great. I am luck and grateful to have such a good team behind my back: a husband and a daughter who have been very understading of me and all my craziness.


Monday, September 7, 2020

An Angel Is Born

My dearest Lilly,

You came earlier than expected. And nothing could have prepared us of your coming although we have been excitedly waiting for you since you were  conceived. It took years, you see, before I got pregnant with you. We have prayed for you and He has answered our prayers at a time when we least expected it.


I had my worries during the course of my pregnancy with you, because I was turning forty and there are lots of risks that go with a late pregnancy. But our Lord is gracious and faithful and gave us a healthy baby girl. There were complications during childbirth, but it was all perhaps for a reason. You are now 19 days old and growing bigger and filling our days with surprises and our sleepless nights with wonder. Looking back at what we have been through the past couple of weeks, I could say that you have been through a lot, that I still cry remembering your pain each time they wanted to get your blood samples for tests. The Corona pandemic didn't make it any easier for us, as it did not allow for hospital visits from other family members and friends but the positive thing is, we were able to bond better and have the time just for ourselves. 

There are lots of challenges, surprises that will come our way, in this journey together with you but I am positive and happy because everyone in the family is here to support you and me: your daddy, your big sister and even our dog Suki. For that I am grateful. We are all happy that you, our little angel, is born. And we have lots of plans with you, going on family trips and family adventures, or just spending lazy days at home.

We welcome you into our life, our little angel, our Lilly Anne. We thank God for you. Thank you for being born.


Monday, August 17, 2020

Lilly Anne

Remember my post about which baby name to give our second child?

I had a list of girl names, carefully thought of and debated over. And all members of the family, well the three of us, got to vote and choose what would suit our little girl best.

And so it is finally decided! She shall be called "Lilly Anne".


And by the grace of God, may she grow up to be what her name embodies. My fervent prayer: that we as her parents and sibling, may be able to guide, support and nurture her to become the person that our Almighty has planned her to be.


Baby Shower for Little Lilly

Last Friday, a good girlfriend of mine celebrated her birthday. I asked her beforehand if she would be our little girl's godmother and she eagerly replied with a "Yes!". And so it happened that she also threw a baby shower for our coming child on the occassion of her birthday. We just felt so happy and loved for it was a very intimate gathering of good friends, celebrating my friend's birthday and celebrating the life of a soon to be member of our community. It felt like heaven was also celebrating with us, because we had a mild weather, it rained in the morning and so the afternoon air was cool and pleasant.

Here are some snippets of the baby shower and the birthday celebration. It was a first for me although this is my second pregnancy because baby showers were not yet a trend some 12 years ago.   


The nicely decorated cake table with some diaper cakes.
Baby socks and baby bodys hanged on the line make for perfect "baderitas"!
The birthday / baby shower cake. It was delicious!
Forgot to ask what it was made of though because of too much excitement.

The diaper cakes lovingly hand crafted by my friends.
Cake pops? No! These are oreo cookies coated in milk and white chocolate and
garnished with sugar sprinkles. Lovingly prepared by my friend's daughter.
My daughter and my friend's son, trying out the oreo pops!
Of course, our sumptuous feast composed of grilled meat,
the ever present pancit, and some fresh salads to balance it out!
My heart is overflowing with gratitude for all the love, well wishes for a safe delivery and healthy baby, and gifts for our little girl. We received not one, not two, but three diaper cakes among other gifts... This is very useful because the little one will surely be using them, until such time that she is potty trained.

Our little angel is expected to come out into this world in September. It is not easy to be pregnant with the pandemic still going on, but observing proper hygiene protocols, keeping distance at gatherings, and wearing masks when in enclosed public places, one can still enjoy the little things life has to offer. I pray always for a healthy baby. 

And I also pray that things will turn out for the better in the coming days... 


Thursday, July 30, 2020

What To Pack In Your Hospital Bag

Pregnant and now on your third trimester? Now is the time to slowly prepare for the big day. It is important to prepare your hospital bag before your contractions start so that you have everything that you would need already packed and ready in the car. It would be very inconvenient if you forgot important documents at home. 

istock.com / grinvalds
So what do you need to pack? Here are some things that you will definitely need in your hospital bag:

For childbirth, you should pack the following:
- Mother's passbook and health insurance card: this is important as it contains all the important data about your pregnancy, the tests and screenings done on you and the baby, as well as the results, and of course it records your routine checks with your gynecologist / midwife.
- your birth plan if there is any
- Marriage certificate or your and the father's birth certificate if you are unmarried
- 2 long comfortable night shirts / summer dress with buttons up front
- comfortable pants
- slip on shoes and warm socks
- lip balm
- massage oil
- things that will help you relax like books, music, etc.
- personal care and hygiene products
- camera / music player, headphone and charger

For your hospital stay after childbirth:
- documents for the registration of baby's birth
- night shirts / dresses with front opening for breastfeeding
- bathrobe
- comfortable clothing
- nursing pads
- underwear
- absorbent sanitary pads (no tampons!)
- nursing bra
- personal care items, towels
- smartphone with charger
- some money for the vending machine
- necessary medication if you are taking them

For your partner: Your partner or husband also needs to pack for his provisions especially if it is going to be a long night. He should also pack a set of clothes to change into, comfortable ones since it is going to be warm in the delivery room. Food and refreshments should come in handy. You can also inquire at the hospital or clinic where you can buy provisions.

For your baby: You should also pack separately for your baby. Hospitals will not allow you to leave with the baby if you don't have baby seat in the car so be sure to have one when the baby is ready to home. You will also need:
- diapers
- baby clothes, a strampler is perfect
- baby socks or shoes, baby cap and mittens
- a light or a warm jacket depending on the weather / season
- cotton cloths / blanket

These should be ready at least 4 weeks before your due date because you never know when your baby will come. Surprises will always come along the way even if both you and the baby are all healthy and your pregnancy is also going in the right track. This way, you will not forget anything and will not panic when the time comes.


Tuesday, July 28, 2020

Welcoming a New Child

Children are a joy. They bring light, energy, and laughter to any household. But new babies, especially for first-time parents, can bring many unexpected hurdles and obstacles as mothers and fathers begin the magical journey of parenting. All adults should plan ahead in these three key areas before bringing a new baby home.

Safe Space
Babies need to arrive home to a safe environment free of hazards. This includes not only childproofing a home, with necessities such as outlet plugs, safety gates, and more but also ensuring the baby feels safe and secure in his or her designated sleeping space. Before bringing a newborn home from the hospital, parents should carve out a designated nursery space, preferably a room that can adapt and grow with the child over time as he or she transitions from an infant to a toddler. Guardians should make sure a crib, changing table, rocking chair, and comfortable carpets are placed on the floor for the baby to play. Of course, parents should ensure the nursery is well-stocked with diapers, clothes, bibs, and other baby necessities.

Health and Heart
Once a baby arrives home, it will soon be time for initial checkups at the doctor to assess growth and development while administering shots and vaccines for a healthy life. Parents should research pediatricians in their area and meet with physicians ahead of time to determine a mutual fit.

Loving Care
Before parents know it, it will be time to venture out on their first solo outing after bringing a new baby home. Whether it be an appointment, work, or a date night, parents should plan ahead and secure reputable, trustworthy childcare long before the bundle of joy arrives home. New families can screen in-home babysitters, interview nannies, or consider infant care Tampa to provide care for new babies. Regardless of the choice, childcare workers must be loving, experienced, and dependable to watch over newborns.

New babies bring life and excitement to the world. By planning ahead with care all parents will be ready to welcome their baby home.


Tuesday, July 21, 2020

Last Day High

Today is my last day at work before I go on my maternity protection leave with subsequent parental leave. The day started as always, I came in later than my supposed official time, but my colleagues understand my situation and I am very thankful for their flexibility. This momma is getting slower and slower, as the day of her due date nears. Anyway, I checked on my emails first to see if there were some urgent matters that need attending to. There was none. Then I went on as usual with my work: inputting orders into our system, making sure orders are made, and confirmed orders to customers. There really wasn't that much work, except to have my email account set-up so new messages will officially be forwarded to my colleague so that she will not always have to look into my incoming mails. Then I made some calls in the office in relation to my leaving, so that all will go well. I also got some calls from colleagues who were on home office, wishing me a good and safe delivery and a healthy baby. I also started doing my "farewell" rounds, so that I wouldn't have do a big round at the end of the day and exhaust myself doing it.

Then it was time for lunch. I always look forward to lunches at our canteen. The food is always served fresh, cooked and served on the same day. And for a very good price at that. Some colleagues also came by my table to wish me well. Atfer lunch, I went do some quick farewell to our boss and to the management. 

Such a sweet and wonderful surprise from my colleagues at work.
I went back to my work desk, and then my colleagues from our department came with a surprise gift in hand. It was really a wonderful, beautiful surprise, I was so moved I had to stop myself from crying. I will truly miss my colleagues in my department, they have always been so supportive of me and they taught me a lot. Although I have a different background, I was really able to fit in with the group and formed a harmonious relationship with all of them. To think I am the only one with an Asian background and all of them are Germans. 

This was the content of the gift package: a stuffed toy, a card with my colleague's signatures,
a set of overall and bib, and two gift cards loaded with money.
I was so happy, I can use it to buy my baby's diapers and Co. 
Soon it was time to say goodbye. It felt exhilerating and at the same time sad to be taking my leave. Don't get me wrong. I am very happy and excited to face this new phase in our life but it just felt weird somehow to leave as if I will not be coming back. But I will be back, when all goes well after a year. It is weirder because of the pandemic. You cannot just give your colleague a hug or shake their hands as a gesture of thanks and saying farewell. But I will be back. It is just a brief farewell after all and not a goodbye. 


Why You Should Attend a Birth Preparation Course

It has been years since I had my first child and I belong to that group of pregnant women who are categorized as a "risk pregnancy" patient because of age. :)

I am generally a very calm, cool and composed person, but with my advanced age, I also cannot help but worry about giving childbirth at this age. True, many women get pregnant at a later stage in life and medical technology has advanced further making childbirth at this stage safer for both child and mother. But still...

That is why I find it important to be more prepared than ever of what is to come. With the complications that go with a late pregnancy, a childbirth preparation course is what expectant moms like me need. For first-time moms, taking a childbirth preparation course also makes sense.

What To Expect at a Childbirth Preparation Course
This course helps women, and also also men, to prepare for childbirth, emotionally and physically. It helps women emotionally, when they better understand what happens to their body during childbirth. Questions like how does childbirth take place, how do you know when you will have the baby, or what does the baby do during childbirth in your tummy, and what do mommies feel physically. All these questions will be answered by an experience midwife during the course.

It also oftentimes helps expectant fathers, when they know the possible ways to help their spouses: small handles, for example, that relieve the pain of labor a little, breathing techniques that can be done together with their wife, etc.

A visit to the delivery room is also an important part of many childbirth preparation courses. To be able to see what the deelivery room looks like, how it feels to be there, takes away much of the anxiety of many pregnant women.

Another ground for worry for most pregnant women is the physical stress brought about by childbirth. But in a childbirth preparation course, one learns how to breathe in a contraction or with the help of which movements you can relieve the floor of your pelvis and push the birth a little forward. The midwife will also show you the different birthing positions and explain the possibilities for pain relief such as peridural anaesthesia or acupunture.

Furthermore, a birthing class not only teaches about birth preparation, but also teaches about what to do with the first moments with your baby: how to change diapers and clothes, how to properly hold the baby, etc.

These are just some of the reasons why a birthing class makes sense. With these,  I hope you will also consider taking one for your own peace of mind.


Monday, July 13, 2020

Of Pregnancy and Swollen Feet

It is very common for pregnant women to have edema, water storage in the body which is characterized by swollen feet, swollen hands and even face. This  especially in the third semester of pregnancy. It is unpleasant most of the time, because it is difficult to put on your favorite shoes let alone fit into them and walking can also be difficult. The swelling is worst at the end of the day, after long periods of standing or stitting, especially on warm days. Sometimes you also feel a tightening and prickling of the underarms and hands, even the rings on your fingers become very tight. The swelling could also bring about pain and cramps in the night, which happens to me every now and then.

So what can you do to ease the swelling and discomfort?

1. Wear medical compression stockings / socks. This is very effective in reducing the swelling and should be worn at the beginning of the day, right after you take a shower. Through the compression stocking, the blood circulation is controlled and helps to avoid heavy legs. Most compression stockings are made to order so that you get the correct measurements. And because the swelling on both legs are not the same, having them made to order ensures that each leg is getting the right compression.

2. Raise your legs every now and then. If you sit or stand for the most part of the day, raising your legs every now and then will allow for a better circulation and allows your feet to relax. Be sure to find a comfortable position though especially if you are in the later stage of your pregnancy.

3. Soak your feet in lukewarm water. A good foot soak in lukewarm water with Dead Sea salt in it also helps ease swelling. Be sure that the waster reaches up to your calves. The lukewarm water helps in circulation.

4. Massage your feet with the help of lavender cypress oil. This has a cooling effect and should be done right after your foot soak. Massage your feet first and work your way up to the ankles, calves, knees and thighs. The cooling effect helps to reduce the flow of blood down to your feet.

5. Eat a good balanced diet. A good balanced diet that is by no means low in salt has a positive influence on the course of the pregnancy and can, in many cases, prevent or alleviate edema.

6. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. Drink at least 2 liters of water per day. Proper hydration is important. It is also not advisable to restrict your salt intake unless your doctor advised it. The common notion that you should drink less and avoid salt in your diet when you have edema is medically outdated, because this does not help and can even worsen the problem.

7. Pay attention to regular exercise. Recommended for pregnant women are walks and swimming. Staying in the water is helpful because the hydrostatic pressure of the water can push back the edema.

8. Taking alternating showers or baths. Alternating showers or baths, combined with a subsequent brush massage using a soft massage brush or a massage glove, stimulate the blood circulation and thus the transport of fluids in the body.

9. Cucumber face mask for your swelling face. If your face is swollen during pregnancy, this can be taken cared of with a cooling cucumber mask. On cleansed face, simply lay thinly sliced cucumbers or you can puree the cucumber and mix it with low-fat curd cheese and apply.

These are just some of the tips that can help ease or reduce edema during pregnancy. Do you have other tips? Then do share in the comments below and I will update the list.

Have a healthy and safe pregnancy!


Sunday, May 31, 2020

Official Paperworks When Giving Birth in Germany

The birth of a child is always a unique experience for parents. There is nothing else that anyone would like to do as to just pay attention and dedicate your time to your newborn child. Unfortunately, with the birth of a child comes the important paperworks and formalities that parents need to submit and fulfill. 

For this second pregnancy, it will be like doing things the first time since it is my first time giving birth here. In Germany, there are various things that need to be accomplished, not just for the formalities but also to be able to receive monetary support from the government. Here are important things that you need to take note of in order for everything to be in order and to do them properly.  I should prepare the paperworks before the baby comes out so that processing will be easier and faster.

I have come up with a list of the most important administrative formalities related to birth and have also noted the requirements, deadlines, costs if any and the responsible office.


1. Birth certificate (Geburtsurkunde): The birth certificate should be applied at the relevant civil registry office (Standesamt) within 7 days from the child's birth. This is oftentimes taken cared of by the hospital, since they are required to register newborns. The birth certificate costs €10 for the original and €5 for every certified copy. Documents needed are the parents' identification cards or passports for foreigners (Personalausweis), marriage certificate (Heiratsurkunde), birth confirmation from the hospital (Geburtsbescheinigung), and acknowledgement of paternity (Vaterschaftsanerkennung) for unmarried parents.

2. Paternal Acknowledgement (Vaterschaftsanerkennung): This is only applicable for parents who are unmarried. It should ideally be done before the child is born, so that the father's name could be directly entered into the birth certificate, but can also be done after birth. Otherwise, only the name of the mother will be noted. The father also does not necessarily have to be the biological father. There are no deadlines for the paternal acknowledgement. To apply for this, the following documents need to be presented at the civil registry office (Standesamt) or youth welfare office (Jugendamt): parents' identification cards or passports, birth certificate of the father, consent of the mother. The paternal acknowledgement is free of charge.

3. Health Insurance (Krankenversicherung): Because every person is required to have a health insurance coverage in Germany and so that the child is also insured for later check-ups, it is important to apply the newborn child for a health insurance. The child can be accommodated in the health insurance of the mother or the father by means of the birth certificate and/or paternal acknowledgement. For this purpose, an admission form can be requested by phone from the health insurance company. It is important to perform the official paperworks as soon as possible, so that the child can be insured as soon as possible, too! The costs of the insurance is dependent on the tarif. Documentary requirements include the birth certificate and admission form of the health insurance company, and paternal acknowledgement when necessary, and should be applied at your own health insurance provider.

Having a newborn child also mean that you need some financial support from the government because as an employee, you will have to stop working for a period of time to take care of your baby. In Germany, they provide child allowance until the age of 18, maternity allowance, and parental allowance for a maximum of 12 months should you decide to go on a parental leave.

4. Maternity Allowance (Mutterschaftsgeld): For employed women who are private or family-insured, the maternity allowance can be applied at the Federal Insurance Office (Bundesversicherungsamt). The case is different for statutory insured women, as the maternity allowance will be paid by the insurance provider. The maternity protection allowance is given along with the employer's allowance for pregnant women who are on maternity leave. The maternal protection period for permanently employed pregnant women is from six weeks before to eights weeks after birth. To get this benefit, you should be insured with a statutory health insurance company as this is not paid under private health insurance. The amount of the allowance is maximum €13 per calendar day. You will need the following documents: employer certificate (Arbeitgeberbescheinugung), certificate of the presumed delivery date (Bescheinigung des mutmaßlichen Entbindungstermins), and filled-up application form for maternity allowance. The application should be submitted to the Federal Insurance Office for private or family-insured women or to the health insurance company for statutory insured women in good time before the begin of the maternity leave.

5. Parental Allowance (Elterngeld): The parental allowance serves to compensate for lost income. The administrative procedures after the birth can only be carried out at the offices designated by the state government, which are listed on the website of the Federal Ministry for Families (Bundesministerium für Familien). The amount of the reimbursement is based on the previous net income. An application should be made immediately after birth because the payment is only made retrospectively for a maximum of three months. To apply, you will need the birth certificate, parental allowance application form, and payslip from the last 12 months. The responsible office varies by federal state. You can find information on the parental allowance office (Elterngeldstelle) in your area from your city, district and municipal administration or from family advice centers. 

6. Child Allowance (Kindergeld): Child allowance or benefit is given to children until they reach 18 years. The application for child allowance (Kindergeldantrag) is processed by the employment agency (Agentur für Arbeit), with processing times approximately between 1-1.5 months. It is possible to apply to the authorities for child benefit before the birth, but the application is only valid when the birth certificate is submitted. Payment is made from the month of birth and is paid retrospectively for a maximum of 3 months if the processing time is longer. The limitation period for the legal claim is four years. You will need to submit the birth certificate and the application form, which is available at the Agentur für Arbeit website.  

7. Income Tax Card (Lohnsteuerkarte): Have your income tax card changed. If you want to benefit from the child allowance, you must have your offspring noted on the income tax card. The income tax card can be applied for before birth, however the registration itself only takes place afterwards because the birth certificate is required for this. The change has to be accomplished as soon as you receive the birth certificate at the Residents' Registration Office (Einwohnermeldeamt). You will need to bring your income tax card, personal identification or passport, of course the birth certificate and paternal acknowledgment (for unmarried parents). 

8. Parental leave (Elternzeit): As a soon-to-be mother, you will of course want to spend time with your baby for as long as possible. That is why there is the parental leave. Generally, expectant mothers have a legal right to take parental leave until the child is three years old. This must of course be registered with the employer in writing at least seven weeks before the start of the parental leave. Not a classic administrative procedure after the birth, but nevertheless mandatory, the notification of the birth to the employer can be combined directly with the application for maternity protection and parental leave. Most mothers take 12 months of parental leave because during this time, they can also receive parental allowance. But if you financial capacity allows, you can take the maximum of three years. 

So there, hope this list will help other expectant moms like me living in Germany to prepare for the administrative procedures that go along with giving birth here. And I wish for a healthy and safe pregnancy.   


Friday, May 29, 2020

My Pregnancy And Some of Its Complications

So I am now in my 26th week of pregnancy and my belly has bubbled as I have swallowed an entire watermelon! I am feeling the joys of my baby's kicks, sommersaults and punches. Oh yes, this baby moves a lot!

I had two check-ups this week: one for the special organ malfunction screening at a specialist since I belong to the high-risk pregnancy group and the routine prenatal check-up at my OB-Gyne.

During the special organ malfunction screening, a fine ultrasound screening was done to check if everything about the baby is okay. They would look at all the organs especially the vital ones: heart, brain, lungs, kidneys, ets. and measure the size of the extremities, look if the ears, eyes, nose and mouth are where they should be. The baby's heartbeat is also checked and also the flow of blood and "food" supply between mother and fetus. I am happy and relieved to say that everything about the baby is okay, she is healthy and even growing up faster than her gestational age.

The specialist found out during the screening that I have an increased amount of amniotic fluid, a medical condition called polyhydramnios, so I had to do more tests to find out what has caused it. Aside from the usual routine checks at my gynecologist, I had to give blood samples to check my sugar levels and also to check for infections. 

"Should I be worried?" This is what I asked my gynecologist. She told not to worry too much about it because we are still waiting for the results of the blood tests. And as shown in the special screening, the baby is growing despite the increase in amniotic fluid.

I was informed though of the possible complications of severe cases, one of which is the late positioning of the baby because it has extra room to move in the later stage of the pregnancy. It is also possible to have pre-term labor or have premature birth. Or the baby grows too big. The placenta detaching from the wall of the uterus before giving birth is also possible. An umbilical cord prelapse can also occur in which the umbilical cord falls out of the vagina before the baby. In worst cases, it could lead to stillbirth. 

So should I be worried? Thinking about the possible complications, one cannot help but be! But I have a very supportive family and friends who listen to me and my gynecologist and her team are also good and competent so I need not really worry too much. I just have to take of myself, relax as much as possible, take care of my food intake and enjoy this little one growing inside of me. Hopefully, the bloodworks will also turn out well and if not, at least we can take preventive and curative measures and monitor the baby. 


Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Basic Maternity Fashion for Moms-To-Be

If you are pregnant, you should wear clothes that are comfortable but also chic and fashionable. Choose materials that are skin-friendly like cotton, with a share of lycra or spandex so it stretches with your growing tummy. Here are some basic items that you should have to accompany you during your pregnancy 


1. Comfortable Shoes: Whether you choose for ballerinas or mules with a low heel, they are simply easy to put on - you just slip your feet in and they are also never go out of style. With such shoes, you also do not have to bend over your growing tummy to, for example, tie your laces or adjust straps. Choose styles that have a slightly tapered tip as rounded ones will tend to optically shorten your legs. Choose good quality shoes, as there is a high chance that you will still be wearing them post pregnancy.

Mama straight jeans in dark wash from H&M.
2. P-pants / jeans: It is always good to have a pair or two of p-pants or mama pants. Choose a pair with a dark washing, because it optically makes you look leaner than light jeans, and a pair with a straight cut. These pants have an elastic adjustable band to ensure optimal comfort. Allow time to try a few pairs until you find one in which you truly feel comfortable in.

Tunic blouse from Esprit.
3. Tunics: Tunics have been a trend for sometime now and you can choose one that doesn't have to be a maternity model. These type of clothing are cut wide and long and offers enough space where a mom-to-be needs it the most: on the bust, of course in the tummy area, and also around the hips. Choose cheerful colors or with a decorated neckline. A round or v-neck cut may show a bit of skin but it optically lengthens the neck.

Wraparound dress from H&M.
4. Wraparound: A wraparound dress made from elastic material accentuates your figure. The V-cut beautifully emphasises your growing décoletté. The band slung around the waist optically separates the tummy and the bust and emphasizes your feminine figure. This flexible dress also grows along with your growing tummy. There are also styles that are breastfeeding friendly.


Mama jersey leggings also from H&M.
5. Leggings: black or dark colored leggings or elastic pants are comfortable and fashionable all year round. You can pair with a knee-length boots in winter or with ballerinas or sandals in summer.  Maternity leggings have an extra adjustable band. Just be sure to pair your leggings with a top that reaches down to your hips and  bottom!

So these are just some of the basic clothing to have during your pregnancy. What are your maternity fashion must haves? Do share them with me! 


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